The Real Ending for Star Wars IV: A New Hope
What I think really happened
From his command station inside the war room at Base One, Senior Flight Controller Rharo Olen ran diagnostics for the targeting computer on Red Five, the X-wing piloted by Luke Skywalker. All systems nominal. He checked again. All systems nominal.
In outer space above him, Luke Skywalker maneuvered his X-wing through a narrow trench on the surface of the Death Star, racing toward the exhaust port into which he would fire two proton torpedoes. A direct hit, Rharo prayed, would set off a chain reaction that would explode the Death Star and save the Rebellion.
Luke’s X-wing closed rapidly on the exhaust port, his proton torpedoes armed, a squadron of TIE fighters on his tail. Almost there . . . almost there . . .
The power indicator for Luke’s targeting computer flashed red. Rharo flicked open comms.
“Luke, you switched off your targeting computer. What’s wrong?”
“Nothing. I’m all right.”
A hundred problems ran through Rharo’s mind. Was the targeting computer malfunctioning? Was it the hardware? The software?
“Did you try rebooting it? Sometimes you have to reboot it.”
“No, the targeting computer’s fine. I just switched it off.”
Rharo’s stomach did a back flip, nearly sending up the Bantha sandwich he’d gotten from the wheeled lunch droid a half hour earlier.
“What? Why would you do that?”
“I’m going to use the Force.”
“What force?”
“The Force, that’s what force. The energy field that surrounds all living—I don’t have time to explain.”
Rharo swallowed hard.
“Stand by, Red Five,” he said, and turned a panicked face toward General Dodonna. The General rushed over.
“What is it? What’s going on with Luke?” asked the General.
“He shut off his targeting computer.”
“What?! Why?!”
“He says he’s going to take the shot using . . . the Force.”
The General pounded his fists on the flight desk. The lunch droid, who had come with a menu of drink specials, zipped away.
“That fodding Obi-Wan! He’s behind this!”
“That’s a possibility, General.”
“We’ve been perfecting these targeting computers for years. Doesn’t Luke know how hard we’ve been training for this? And what, he’s going to ruin it all because of a dead mystic in funny robes?”
“Looks that way, General.”
“Open comms. Let me speak to him.”
Rharo flicked a switch. The General sweetened his voice.
“Hey, Luke. Hey, buddy. This is General Dodonna. How’s it going? Listen, I heard you’re going to try to blow up the Death Star using the Force, instead of, you know, our very expensive targeting computer, the one we built just for this mission. Listen—I’m as much a fan of the Force as anybody. One time on Tatooine, I used it to pour myself a cup of Jawa Juice. I didn’t even have to leave the couch! But we’re in the middle of a very important battle, Luke, and this is a serious military matter. So if you don’t mind, could you switch back on the targeting computer and take the shot? Thanks, pal.”
Luke didn’t hesitate in his reply.
“I’m sorry, General. I’m going to follow my instinct on this one. I’m going to use . . . the Force.”
The General stepped back from comms. He looked as though he could strangle a Tauntaun.
“I swear to Alderaan, if we get blown up by the Death Star, I’m going to find Obi-Wan in the afterlife, rip that cloak off his back, and shove that light saber so far up his behind he’ll be spitting sparks.”
“I’ll just close comms, General.”
“The kid splashes around a swamp with a grammar-challenged muppet, and now he thinks he’s smarter than the rest of us?”
“Yes, General.”
The General smoothed the front of his shirt and breathed.
“Ok, here’s what we’re going to do. You know the targeting computer better than anyone, right?
Rharo hesitated. “Well, sir. I—”
“Save the modesty. I want you to hack into Luke’s. Can you do that?”
Rharo doubted himself for a moment, but yes, he knew, it could be done.
“Yes, General.”
“Good. We’ll get one of the pilots here to take the shot remotely. Someone who has spent his time training for battle, not juggling swamp rocks with his mind.”
With a few taps, Rharo took control of Luke’s targeting computer and transferred fire control to a pilot inside Base One. The pilot took the shot without hesitation, easily landing two proton torpedoes into the exhaust port of the Death Star.
It exploded in a shower of light.
The Rebellion was saved.
The lunch droid spun in happy little circles.
“Thank you, Rharo. You saved us. Does Luke know what we did?”
“I don’t think so, sir. I think he thinks the Force was responsible.”
“What a nerf-herder,” said General Dodonna.
And it ends with nerf herder….c’est magnifique